Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Positive in, Negative OUT!

Today, I was working with a client...tough situation emotionally!  She has a guy who's been stringing her along for awhile, and it just seems like he enjoys hurting her feelings.

Your journey may include people like this, whether they are negative about your weight loss or your struggles to improve your life.  Maybe they try to take you down a notch on a regular basis with biting comments or jaded put-downs.

I had my own experience with that several years ago from my husband (we're still married!).  Comments about my weight loss and how it was not the best thing because clearly I was going to become some seedy mistress or that somehow it would make me less attractive to the masses, when in fact, it was making me healthier, happier, and better in many ways.

People will tend to panic when you are changing yourself, even for the better.  This happens for a bunch of reasons.  Maybe they see you moving ahead and they're getting left behind.  Maybe they're jealous, but unwilling to make a positive change for themselves.  Whatever the case, they are not helping you.  Their comments and digs hurt.  They can make you waver in your resolve.  Do not let this happen.

You are in charge of YOU.  You make the decisions for yourself:  for your actions and your emotions and your reactions.  You can't control those other people, but you can control yourself.  Make the choice that's in your best interest.  Focus on the positive, and get the negative out of your life.  It doesn't mean you have to divorce the husband, or the offending sister, or the friend, although sometimes that is what's best.  It does mean you need to take responsibility for controlling what you do, and not allow others to wreak emotional havoc with you.

You deserve better.


Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Denial Got Me Here

I came across a picture last night.  A picture of me about 100# ago.  And I started wondering: "How did I let that happen?  How did I let myself go?"  Denial got me to that point.

I remember making my own clothes at that point, and using a size 16 pattern, for my size 24 self.  I would cut the fabric about 4 inches outside that size 16 line.  I would look in the mirror, and try to convince myself I was still the same...still an average size.  I remember comparing myself to other people, too.  I thought the thinner people had some special pact with God, and I thought the fatter people were definitely fatter than me.

And I remember eating way too much.  And not moving.  And walking up a flight of stairs that made me so out of breath it took me 5 minutes to recover.

What got me there?  Denial.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Is Your Head in the Game?

Just back from a run...the longest I've ever done.  I'm no Flo-Jo-well, nice manicure (thanks Angee), but certainly no track star!  To be honest, I've always hated running.  I felt that way because in grade school, I was younger than most of my classmates, and so slower; the last kid picked for sports teams, I never really felt like I excelled at athletics.  Because of this, I felt discouraged from trying harder, and just gave up.

Why am I telling you this?  Because I realized something while running today:  it's all in your head.  I thought I couldn't do better, so I couldn't.  Today, I thought I could, and I did.  Is it really that simple?  Is it possible to do something because you think you can, or because you want it really badly?  Yes.  I ran with my 11.5 year old golden retriever, and his head is in the game.  His body says "maybe", but his head says "YES!" 

How many times have you been exercising, and the voice inside your head says "ugh, I'm tired, let's stop", or "my legs are burning, I don't want to do any more"?  And if you are distracted from that negative self talk, are you able to get through it?  I bet so.

Herein lies the secret.  You can do it.  You can accomplish your goals.  Maybe you need to be in a class with the instructor cheering you on.  Or maybe the personal trainer keeps your head in the game and stops you from being distracted by your negative self talk.  Or a workout partner helps you get through the rough spots.  Whatever the trick for you, I assure you there IS a way for you to succeed.  Let's find it together!